So here is something new. I asked the wife to provide some entertaining content for the web this week. Maybe we will make this a regular thing. Maybe I will let her write everything from now on. Who knows. Her name is Deetz, and she is awesome. Read on and find out why.
Last week I was innocently sitting eating my steel cut oatmeal with blueberries, strawberries and peanut butter when I thought “this is such a good breakfast, Hank should let me do a guest post on his blog.” Hank was all like, “sure, that’d be great, but everyone’s done oatmeal. It’s been done.” Which I took to mean, “cute idea, babe, but no thanks.” Then yesterday he said, “by the way I’d like your blog entry by Monday.”
“I need an idea,” I thought. “What is his crazy fitness blogging brain thinking? How am I supposed to write about fitness stuff when he’s the fitness guy? I just liked my breakfast. I need a support group for this…” and shortly thereafter the idea for Spouses Of the Overtly Fit (hereafter referred to as SpOOF) was born.
SpOOF is an organization for those who are married to fitness bloggers, those who have suddenly found themselves pulled into the wild and crazy world of the fitness blogger. You might be eligible to be part of this organization if you can identify with any of the following scenarios. For instance, you might be wondering why I was thinking about taking a picture of oatmeal in the first place. This can be example number one of how you know you are married to a fitness blogger. You start thinking about taking pictures of your food because they are always taking pictures of their food. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like looking at pictures of food, but generally the pictures of food that I like to look at are followed by a luscious recipe that begins with my favorite words, “first cream together the butter and the sugar.”
Fitness bloggers, however, like to take pictures of things like plates full of broccoli, sweet potatoes, spinach, and chard. Not cookies, cakes, and brownies. At our house (or the Whole Foods cafeteria), plates of healthy food are routinely photographed for your, the readers, viewing pleasure.
Another food idiosyncrasy you might recognize is that once said food has been photographed you cannot take bites of it. Chances are it has been premeasured so that the calories can be recorded. And if you sneak a bite, you sneaky snake, you will be taking away from your beloved’s carefully allotted calorie count, and we can’t have that. Hand’s off! This has been really weird for me because I was a long term Weight Watcher and so accustomed to logging points, calories, etc… But since Hank has started logging his calories, it’s like I can’t log mine. The more religious he has become about tracking each calorie taken in, the further off the reservation I’ve gone. While he is zealously noting every nibble, I am… well, not. I just can’t do it. Confession: If you are married to a fitness blogger you might feel the urge to be rebellious and sneak eat… No? It’s just me? Yeah right. I didn’t think so. I don’t know why we do it, but let’s get over it together. It can’t be good for us. Let’s eat responsibly. Together we can. And, if you really must eat that square of Dove Dark Chocolate go ahead. It’s okay. Be accountable for every delicious nibble of that antioxidant rich, free-radical-busting, blood-pressure-lowering, consumed-in-moderation morsel.
Okay, now to get away from incriminating confessions and continue on our discussion of the changing eating habits of a fitness blogger… Chances are if you are married to a fitness blogger you have a refrigerator full of Chobani yogurt. If you are lucky, you may have even received a BIG box of Chobani in the mail, for free. Delicious, nutritious, protein filled Chobani Greek yogurt. We are addicted at our house. We eat it by the bucket full. Even our 2 year old is addicted to it and eats it every morning for breakfast. Seriously, he wakes up in the morning and immediately is ready for breakfast. He is definitely getting his protein and calcium with all of the Chobani Champions he consumes, but that is another tangent. (Unless anyone from Chobani reads this and is interested in a very cute young spokesperson, if that’s the case, call me!)
Now that you’ve had a glimpse of the signs that you might be eligible for membership in SpOOF you might be wondering, “What are the benefits to me?” Well, let me tell you. At SpOOF we can hang out together while our spouses are using the restroom. Fitness bloggers drink lots, and lots, and lots of water. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. They also eat lots of greens and lots of fiber. Chia seeds have like 5
grams of fiber for one tiny tablespoon. All of this translates into lots of private bathroom time. And that is all we will say about that.
We SpOOFers can also hang out and chat while our beloveds are busy blogging, tweeting, and posting their fitness achievements/inspirational thoughts/interesting tidbits. Because people love fitness bloggers and all that they have to say. Chances are your spouse is never far from their iPhone, iPad, Android, laptop, or other communication device. After all, what good is it to beat your personal best time at planking/running/burpeeing if you don’t immediately let someone else know that you’ve beaten it.
You’ve got to stay connected. Seriously, these Polar fitness stats are NOT going to post themselves.
All kidding aside, having Hank join the world of fitness blogging has been a wonderful experience. We’ve both learned a lot and I’m really proud of all he’s accomplished. It’s challenged me to start exercising on a regular basis, drink more water, and I’m glad to have our whole family eating healthy together. I feel like we’re setting great examples for our kids and that the changes we’ve made/are making will have long term benefits not just for our health but for theirs and I couldn’t ask for more than that.
Until next time (because apparently, if you like me, there will be a next time) Viva La SpOOFers!